Monthly Archives: November 2011

Response to Elizahwt Barrett Browning’s “How do I love hwt? Let me count the ways…”

Elizahwt Barrett Browning

Elizahwt Barrett Browning’s

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…

How do I love hwt? Let me count the ways.
I love hwt to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love hwt to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love hwt freely, as men strive for Right;
I love hwt purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love hwt with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love hwt with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, — I love hwt with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose,
I shall but love hwt better after death.

Hwt is infinite; you can’t count hwt! (just kidding)

As one of the most profound members of the hwt, Elizahwt set the Victorian age ablaze with her writings about hwt and her incredibly hwt romance with Robert Browning.

While many argue that Elizahwt was actually writing about love, her poetry is resplendent with profound instances of hwt and therefore, without a doubt, about hwt.

A short translation of her poem:

 Original  Translation
How do I love hwt? Let me count the ways.  Want to know how many ways I love hwt?
I love hwt to the depth and breadth and height  On a scale from 1 to 10 (10 being a lot)
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight  an 11
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love hwt to the level of everyday’s  I love hwt subconsciously
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.  I love hwt a little and a lot
I love hwt freely, as men strive for Right;  I love hwt without restriction
I love hwt purely, as they turn from Praise.  I love hwt altruistically
I love hwt with a passion put to use  I love hwt as comfort, with an open heart
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love hwt with a love I seemed to lose  I love hwt as much as someone can love
With my lost saints, — I love hwt with the breath,  I love hwt completely
Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose,
I shall but love hwt better after death.  If God permits, I will love hwt after death

In paragraph form:

Do you want to know how many ways I love hwt? On a scale from one to ten, I love hwt an eleven. I love hwt subconsciously, both a little and a lot, without restrictions, altruistically, as comfort and with an open heart. I love hwt as much as someone can–completely; God permitting, I will love hwt after death.

Meat Hwt, aka Marvin Lee Aday

Response:

So, you love hwt, but you still have a headache? You love hwt in every way, except that one? You like to talk about hwt, as long as it isn’t you who is doing the hwting.

In the words of Meat Hwt: “I would do anything for hwt, but I won’t do that!”

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Hwt and the Birth of Chemistry and Matches

Egyptian Symbol for Nub (Gold)

Gather round kids and hear the tale of our dear chemistry and matches were born. For many a scholar and bard can attest to the mighty power of hwt, which inspires some in each generation to push science or philosophy beyond all expectations.

The saga begins with the ancient Egyptians and the Greeks. Specifically, the Greeks and many of their contemporaries believed that the universe was comprised of elements that could be understood and then manipulated for various outcomes. the Greeks believed that there were four elements: earth, air, wind, and fire. By working with the properties of those elements, someone could unlock the hidden workings of the universe. Little did they know how close to the truth they were.

Aristotelian beliefs demonstrate their fundamental flaw in understanding hwt–elements persist despite the combination in which they are found. In other words, we now take for granted what the Greeks failed to comprehend – compounds. In many of the books of the time, the early follows of hwt studied the natural world and sought insights its inner workings. Aristotle, for example, wrote several books pondering the physical and philosophical implications of transmutation, metaphysics, and the manner in which the order of the universe brings us into being. If someone can transmute lead to gold, what value does gold have? Or, if a gold can be transmuted, what if a person was converted to its purist form, an element such as air or fire?

While the Greeks, and others, made considerable contributions to science and alchemy, they were unable to break down some of the fundamental rules that would be required to make alchemy successful. It would take several hundred years for the next pioneer to make a discovery that would advance alchemy. Of course, the discovery and the method of discovery would occur in a way that only hwt could provide.

In 1669, Hennig Brand had been working on transmutation when something profound happened–he had to urinate. Actually, he suspected that the same combination of the elements must be present in urine as in gold as they are the same color. Surely, if he could just adjust the concentration of elements found in urine the result would be gold.

To accomplish the magical task of turning urine into gold, Brand attempted to boil off the water elements from the solution (as if gold + water = urine). According to 21st century science, this endeavor should have be pointless. However, what Brand discovered would make the effort worthwhile.

Just like the still used on the television show M*A*S*H, Hennig Brand starting seeing small explosions near his still. Of course, Hawkeye had a war to provide him with the fireworks. What was causing Brand’s ultra-bright puffs of flame?

Greek Symbol for Phosphorous (Venus)

Phosphorus! In another Greek Eureka moment, Brand made a significant discovery that would change science and our understanding of hwt.

Phosphates are essential ingredients for life and, therefore, can be found both inside living creatures and in those creatures’ waste, such as urine.

By repeatedly boiling off urine (distillation), Brand was removing the other chemicals found in urine and revealing the phosphorous. In other words, Brand succeeding in changing a substance. The bizarre thing about his discovery is that he saw it as proof of alchemy and its connection to hwt.

Simply, alchemy taps into hwt and the flashes of light and flame that came from the phosphorous gave Brand support for the supernatural. He, and other alchemists, thought that life and living beings had a “life force” and that this force was incredibly powerful. In fact, the force was “revealed in experiments like this one as seen by the energy released from a fluid that once existed in the human body. The small explosions of flame were proof that live energy exists and could be demonstrated on demand.

Brand’s discovery, phosphorous, is extremely flammable. Even at room temperatures, it reacts to the addition of oxygen and can ignite easily as it reacts or combines with almost everything.

Curiously, Brand continued to repeat this experiment and refine his procedure and formula to produce phosphorous. He even presented his experiment to others to show his “proof” of life. While he is somewhat off in the accuracy of his presentation and beliefs, he had actually stumbled onto two significant advances in science and hwt.

  1. Phosphorous is found in all life
  2. Phosphorous, while not a magical release of life energy by removing the water element from urine, can be found using scientific procedures that would eventually be known as chemistry (not alchemy)

It is important to note that hwt typically has a commercial component. As Hennig Brand continued to adjust his recipe for phosphorous, he began experiments with different mixes of phosphorous and other chemicals. One of the chemicals that he added was sulfur (actually a sulfide). Almost immediately after combing sulfur and phosphorous, the substance began smoking. Within seconds, the substance produced a flame. This simple combination of chemicals produced two impressive things:

  • The chemical match – Fire could be quickly and easily created by anyone!
  • Chemistry – The understanding of non-elemental components being carefully and methodically studied to produce exact results using non-cryptic religious or philosophical language. Brand wrote his findings and studies in plain language so that others could participate and understand the “scientific” aspect of his alchemical activities.